PAST STIRRINGS OCTOBER 2001  

Rants that have previously appeared in Shit Stirrer

26/10/01

A BUNCH OF PRIZE DOPES

It isn't very often that I agree with that obnoxious little shite that goes by the name of Peter Lilley (a very appropriate name considering how lily-livered that Tory scumbag is), but on the subject of cannabis the bastard who was one of the main contributors to the decline of the once envied NHS is absolutely correct.

The Government have, once again, shown just how cowardly they are by merely re-classifying the waccy baccy.

Cannabis has been proven to have medicinal benefits and is far less damaging than the far more obnoxious "legal" drugs of cigarettes and alcohol.

When was the last time any of you saw a crowd of youngsters stoned on the weed going around town smashing everything in sight? I didn't think you had, tokers are far more likely to be sleeping or sitting very contented after a discrete puff.

I may be a drinker and a smoker, but I'd rather spend a night in a Cannibis cafe than a local boozer where, to be perfectly honest, I'd have to constantly watch out for some bastard who'd had too many pints of Courage and wants to show how macho he is by indulging in his favourite sport of "gay-bashing".

The Government had a perfect opportunity to decriminalise or even legalise dope and yet they blew it. Is it any co-incidence that this Government seem to be dominated by a religious mafia?

There is nothing more likely to inflame my passions than a politician spouting about morals. Religion and politics are a dangerous combination.

We have all seen The Blessed Tony criticising the Islamic Governments for their religious fervour and governing by religion, and yet this prize dope then goes and makes a moralistic speech himself.

Come on Labour - dump the dope!

Talking of dopes:

26/10/01

A DANGER TO DEMOCRACY

I am becoming increasingly frustrated and concerned at the antics of the control freaks who otherwise go by the name of the "Millbank Tendency".

These are the PC idiots who try to control every thought of those who are active politically.

We have recently seen the Labour Chief Whip threatening those who are against the senseless slaughter of innocents in Afghanistan and they also refused to allow the House of Commons to have a vote on whether we should go to war.

The Government, and its apologists, are increasingly out of order.

This is, supposedly, a democracy. That means that there is meant to be a degree of free speech. However, every attempt is made to stifle any dissent.

We have seen the disgraceful antics of Jo Moore at the transport department. We endured the extremism and withdrawl of basic civil rights by Uncle Jack Straw.

We have seen the moralising of the Prime Minister.

We have basically been watching a live version of Animal Farm. It is now, however, time to send Squealer Campbell & Co to the abbatoir to be turned into several pounds of sausages and bacon.

These control freaks have also surfaced, from time to time, on this site. I have a message for those who think that Labour can do no wrong - you are very misguided. Your precious Tory will be consigned to the dustbin of history as just another weakling, on a par with Major Disaster, if the Government continues to put style over substance.

Yes, there have been great advances since 1997, but nobody is infallible, or does The Blessed Tony conisder himself to be the Pope now?

To those critics of mine who say that this site is "Kick The Tories" and not "Kick Tory Blair" I have only one message - WHEN THE MORALISING COWARD ACTS LIKE A TORY HE WILL BE TREATED LIKE ONE.

The question I would like answered most of all though is this - is Tony Blair British Prime Minister or George Wanker Bush's lapdog?

By the way, I voted Lib Dem in the General Election because I considered their programme to be a great deal more socialist than Labour's.

20/10/01

DEAR MESSRS LADBROKES

In March of this year I invested the sum of ten pounds sterling with you at your Death-on-Sea office.

This sum of money was then placed on the back of some failing old nag (no it wasn't Margaret Hilda Thatcher!) which failed to negotiate the first fence at Aintree in the Grand National.

Anyway dear sirs, to get to the point of this open letter, following the example of the punters who invested in that other failing old horse Failtrack, I wish to claim back my investment.

I understand that they wish to reclaim every penny that they poured into a company which was bound to fail and since that investment was also a gamble I feel that you owe me the above mentioned ten pounds sterling.

Now (to cut to the threat) if you don't pay this sum I feel that I will have no course open to me but to go to law and reclaim the investment through the courts as the Failtrack shareholders are attempting.

Yours Sincerely,

The Stirrer

Basically, ever so faithful reader(s) of this column the point of the above satirical letter is that the fools who invested in Failtrack might as well have written the above letter to their bookies after every failed gamble. My advice - don't bet, it's a mugs game - become a company director instead, you always win then!

08/10/01

FAILTRACK - A COMMON SENSE TAKE-OVER!

Now that the railway infrastructure is back in public hands it is time for the Government to start taking back the operating companies too.

Whenever a franchise comes up for re-negotiation the routes should be taken back into the public sector.

The privitisation of the railways has been proved to be a poll tax on wheels.

Don't expect any pity to come from this quarter for the investors who have lost a pile in this mess. They have had a free ride on the gravy train for long enough. How on earth can a company justify paying a dividend to it's shareholders when in the trouble Railtrack was?

If the Government can't learn from the lesson of Failtrack then they never will. Transport and privitisation do not mix.

Will The Blessed Tony learn from this? I doubt it somehow, he has ignored the wishes of Londoners over the tube and I am sure that he will privatise Failtrack again when the war chest starts to empty. He needs to be reminded that privatisation is not the only game in town.

02/10/01

TIME FOR THE EURO!

At last The Blessed Tony has come off the fence and started to prepare for our overdue entry into the single European currency.

For too long Tory Governments in this country (possibly including this one?) have dodged the issue of Europe and we have been left to grovel for entry to the club on unfavourable terms.

The Tory policy of continuing isolation would cause a permanent recession that would make Thatcher and Major Disaster's destruction of our economy look like a massive boom.

The time has come to start putting the case for our entry to the British people. If we stay outside the single currency we will see the destruction of so many jobs that the 3 million unemployed under the Tories' 18 years of misrule will seem like full employment. Our economy has never been in better shape than it is now. Just how many more jobs are we going to sacrifice to cowardice before we bow to the inevitable?

During my holiday to Spain I couldn't help noticing how prepared everyone was for the changeover in January. All the prices are in Euros as well as the local currency so there will be no chance of conning people.

What we need now is courage from our elected leaders to take us where we need to go. We have been isolated too long. We need to be in the heart of Europe. To throw our lot in with an increasingly isolationist America would be a grave folly with unimaginable consequences. Under the Tories we would become the 51st state of the USA. Is that really the right way forward for us?